Fried WikiAll things Food, Diet and Weight Related

I stopped in the restroom at Target the other day, and when I washed my hands and looked up, I was surprised by how thin my face looked at that moment. I almost didn’t recognize myself. Not a few moments later, as I walked back out, I passed a mirror, and saw my profile, sending me into spasms of emotional pain by my side view. I’m still so fat. Just moments ago, I noticed my face was thinner.

Today at Kohl’s, I found a pair of sneakers that actually fit without a problem. That’s a reason to cheer in itself. I wear a 10 wide, and even then, it can be hard to find comfortable sneakers. I was frustrated, when I figured I’d try another pair, even though they weren’t a wide, and they fit. To my delight, I got a great deal, and I didn’t have to go to 5 more stores to find a pair to fit right. Man, that felt good, until I walked by a mirror, and once again realized tiny changes aren’t enough.

Each step I take emotionally, I take two steps back. I have a lot of garbage in my head to sort through, and I guess every time I cheer myself on, I don’t want to enjoy it long enough. I shoot myself in the foot with a criticism. I need to stop the negative talk. No matter where I’m at, it’s okay. I’m working towards a healthier goal, and everything I’m doing is positive.

I had my cheat meal yesterday for lunch. I wasn’t even sure what I was in the mood for, but I ended up getting a club at a little local tavern. It was great, but I couldn’t finish it, and I was happy about that. The funny thing about the cheat meal is that I thought about what I wanted all week. By the time it got here, I really still hadn’t come to a decision. I said to myself, “Geez, I like everything I’m eating now anyway. it’s not like it’s that big of a deal”….until I had the mayo on the sandwich! HA! It was GOOD. Oh well, there’s always next Saturday for another cheat meal. Until then, I’m standing strong and staying cheat free.